Humans are wired for connection. Our biology knows it even when we do not. Study after study links strong, supportive social relationships to better health, sharper cognition, lower stress and even longer life. In fact, loneliness has been called the new smoking – a risk factor for premature aging and chronic disease. But not all relationships are created equal.
When you land in a new country, those first friendships often grow from proximity – neighbours, colleagues, or fellow expats who are simply there when you need a friendly face. These connections are such a gift in the early days, helping you find your footing and feel less alone in unfamiliar surroundings. Over time, though, there’s something deeply fulfilling about seeking out people who share your values and aspirations – in my case, a healthy obsession with wellness- kindred spirits who inspire you to grow, support your vision of a vibrant, vital life and make you feel even more at home in yourself.
This is where finding your tribe comes in.
Thriving
A tribe isn’t just a social circle. It is a constellation of relationships that feed your well-being rather than deplete it. It’s the people who “get it” when you talk about wanting to live healthier, age better, or rethink what thriving looks like. The ones who share your curiosity and inspire you to stick with the commitments you have made to yourself.
In a foreign country, building this tribe requires intentionality. You are stepping into a social ecosystem where the bonds of shared history and culture don’t exist for you yet. That can feel daunting – but it is also liberating. You get to curate. You can let go of old patterns where relationships were maintained simply out of habit or proximity and instead ask: Who adds energy to my life? Who shares my values? Who makes me smile?
Everyone has a story. I love hearing them; the wild detours, the unexpected decisions, the dreams they are still carrying. Even the mundane are “new” to me, so I appreciate what others are willing to share. But as much as I value stories, I am careful about where I invest my own energy. Life is too short (and too precious) to spend hours in conversations that leave me feeling drained or disconnected. With limited free time, I choose to spend time with people who are curious, kind, and committed to growing – people who expand my sense of possibility rather than shrink it. Those are my people.
How do you find your tribe? Try starting with these questions:
• What are my non-negotiables when it comes to friendships?
• Where do people who share my passions and lifestyle gather?
• Am I showing up as the kind of person I hope to attract?
Seek out spaces where people are aligned in their values – not just their location. Maybe it is a wellness workshop, a hiking group, a healthy cooking class, a beach clean-up, or a book club focused on topics that inspire you. Say yes to invitations that align with your interests, and no to those that do not. Protect your time like the precious resource it is.
Patience
Building a tribe takes patience. It is not about collecting contacts; it is about cultivating connections. But once you find even a handful of kindred spirits, everything shifts. Suddenly, the challenges of living abroad feel lighter. The victories feel sweeter. And your vision of what life can look like – vibrant, healthy, deeply connected – feels not just possible but inevitable.
So go ahead: seek out your people. Not the ones who merely occupy space in your calendar, but the ones who spark joy, laughter and meaningful conversations. The ones who remind you that, no matter where you are in the world, you are never alone.
And if you are here in Phuket, I would love to make that easier for all of us. I have created a space for those of us who value vibrant health, engaging conversations, and living with intention: the Wellthwise Tribe.
Think of it as your curated community of kindred spirits – people who love to laugh, learn and grow while sipping kombucha instead of cocktails (or maybe both). We will start a monthly Healthy Happy Hour, on the 4th Friday every month. It will be a relaxed gathering where we can share ideas, swap stories and support each other by staying strong, sharp and vibrant.
The first one will be Aug 22, 2025, at the Solis Beach Club in Bang Tao (solis-phuket.com) starting at 4pm. After this one, let’s explore and rotate around the island.
Follow @WellthwiseTribe on Instagram for HHH information and DM me if you would like to be part of the founding circle.
This is not about networking or surface-level small talk. It is about making connections that feel nourishing – like you have found your people.
Are you in?
Libby Heath recently became the first Mayo Clinic certified wellness coach in Asia. She shares her insights and advice through her column ‘Wellthwise’ here in The Phuket News. Please note that if you have a condition that requires medical treatment, consult your doctor. Contact Libby at: BeWellthwise@gmail.com.